Disgusting: Media Outlets Offer Bizarre Defenses For CNN Analyst Jeffrey Toobin Amid Masturbation Scandal

News and media outlets appear to be defending Jeffrey Toobin and his zoom masturbation scandal, according to Fox News.

Vinay Menon wrote for the Toronto Star, Toobin “didn’t cover himself in glory ‒ or regrettably, anything else ‒ in that fateful Zoom call, but CNN and his country need him.”

“Now, look. I do not want to minimize any possible trauma experienced by anyone on that video chat… But we need to keep perspective.”

“We need to see the big picture,” Menon wrote.

“Granted, there are few things more unprofessional than masturbating during a company meeting. Toobin is a lawyer.”

“His judgment is now suspect. I get it. All I’m saying is we need to forget this ever happened. Block it out.”

“Here’s the thing: I don’t care if Jeffrey Toobin has demons. I don’t care if he’s a weirdo or a pervert. I don’t care if he fondles himself 20 times a day while wearing a sun hat and listening to Mozart,” the Toronto Star columnist continued.

“What I care about is his brain and his analytic skills.”

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“He made an embarrassingly stupid mistake. Let’s leave it at that and get on with saving America.”

“We Americans love to talk – and talk, and talk – about sex. But there’s one topic that remains taboo, and Toobin is playing the price for it,” op-ed writer Jonathan Zimmerman said.

“According to a 2016 survey, 95% of men and 81% of women in America have masturbated. Yet in the same poll, over half of respondents say they felt uncomfortable talking about it.”

“News flash: Toobin masturbates. But I’m guessing that you do the same, dear reader. Maybe you should stop feeling weird and guilty about that. Then we can all stop making fun of Jeffrey Toobin,” Zimmerman added.

Fox News:

BuzzFeed News was accused by critics of “normalizing” Toobin’s misconduct, declaring in its headline that he “can’t be the only person masturbating on work Zoom calls.”

“We’re almost finished with our seventh full month of quarantine, a hellscape of endless Zoom happy hours… and Zoom work calls,” BuzzFeed senior culture writer Scaachi Koul said before acknowledging that she often doesn’t wear pants during Zoom calls. “Haven’t we all done something on a work call that, in normal circumstances, we’d never do during a meeting? Let he without sin cast the first stone; the benefit of working from home is in the comfort to do whatever you want. Endless snacks without judgment, cigarette breaks at your leisure, Real Housewives on all goddamn day.”

“You’re going to tell me you’ve never taken a quick three minutes midday to crank your hog? To mash your meat? To butter your own muffin? There’s so little joy left in our lives; are we not at least owed the time to toot our own horns?” Koul wrote. “I mean, maybe not during an active Zoom call where your video is still on. Time and place, I suppose.”


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